So everyone knows the general plot of Harry Potter, but take a look at my version of the events of each film. This is from a slightly skewed shippers perspective. Please keep in mind this is a parody and no offense is meant to any of the actors and/or characters. There is also some bad language and adult themes that you may want the kiddies to stay away from. Contact me with comments and/or criticism. I hope you enjoy!

Dumbledore's been hitting the pipe again...	The Land of Really Unimaginative and Unoriginal Architecture...	Harry is... wait, Harry... is that you?
Good Lord, man!	Last year he was 11...and looked 11.	This year he's 12....
And looks like he should be shaving and drinking whiskey shots!	Highly molestable.	What was I saying? Oh yeah... so anyway... Harry's finally got a bedroom.
I'm not sure what gets me angrier - the fact they kept Harry in a cupboard for 11 years, or the fact they had Dudley's "second bedroom" this whole time and just didn't let Harry use it.	Pricks.	Harry misses Hermione terribly.
And thinks longingly about her.	He can't wait to see her and show her how hot he's gotten over the summer.	Meanwhile, Hedwig's "doing time" on Privet Drive, in her little 'Owl Azkaban'.